Participant number 3 was the first one to answer the question “What is your first memory of love, and how has this shaped how you love?”. The narrative that the participant brought up was those moments of intimacy and connection she had with her grandmother. These moments happened whenever there would be electrical outages in the Dominican Republic – a disruption within “everyday life” and which had the participant thinking there was “nothing to do”. The participant reminisces how her grandmother, who interestingly was blind, would tell her stories and riddles whenever these outages happened all while she rested her head on her thighs. The participant then talks about how her family on her mother’s side is close knit and, for some, clingy, because of the physicality on their demonstration of love. The participant understands that, because of this, she looks for these things in a partner and desires to be the same way with her future children.
Original language transcription
(0:02:06) Participant 3: I have one.
(0:02:08) Gina: and also, like, memory of love, like, it doesn’t have to be really early like, maybe your first memory was when you were 12 so, it’s ok.
(0:02:20) Participant 3: En que lenguaje? En cualquiera?
(0:02:23) [Laughs]
(0:02:23)[Overlapping] Gina: Yo hablo lo’ do’, so, I can translate [..]
(0:02:26) [Overlapping] No porque […] No, no, yo[..]
(0:02:28) Bueno para mi me viene a la mente no e’, no, tal ve’ no sea la primera […]
(0:02:37) Pero siempre en mi casa; en Santo Domingo se va la lu’ señore’. Entonces siempre era, mi abuela era ciega, y mi abuelo, lamentablemente a él le dio un stroke […] so, pero ello siempre han estado juntos, de mucho tiempo.
(0:02:54): Y siempre yo me acostaba, porque si no había luz no había nada que hacer.
(0:02:57) Yo me recostaba la cabeza cuando niña en la […] en el muslo de mi abuela. Y yo le preguntaba, y yo le empezaba a preguntar […]
(0:03:07) Y ella me contaba todo y para todo me hacia una historia y me hacía adivinanzas, y para mi eso era como que un tiempo que […] que no, no […] que ya no […]
(0:03:18) Ya no lo puede hacer porque fallecieron, pero que para mi es, aunque era […] desafortunadamente no había electricidad y cosa, era un buen tiempo para uno estar junto en común […]
(0:03:30) Y hablar y compartir, y saber cosas de su historia, de donde ella vino […]
(0:03:38) Gina to Participant 3: Y como eso influye in how you see love?
(0:03:44) No se, por parte de mi madre todo somo como […] muy pegajoso, que le gu’ta ta salamero, tan mucho besándose, y uno arriba de otro[…] ehh
(0:03:55) Inclusive un tio mio falleció hace dos años y había en donde mi tia un sofa muy grande y toa las primas tamo ahí arriba de, habían mas asientos, pero todas estábamos ahí en el mismo sitio arriba de la otra.
(0:04:05) Y e como que, somos así, para mi eso influye en que deseo en una pareja.
(0:04:15) Y como me gustaría ser con mis hijos también.
Translation:
I have one.
In what language? In any?
Well, for me what comes to might not be, maybe' it's not the first […]
But always in my house -in Santo Domingo you get blackouts, people. So, always, my grandmother was blind, and my grandfather, unfortunately, had a stroke […]so, but they have always been together, for a long time.
And I always went to bed, because if there was no electricity there was nothing to do. When I was a child I used to lay my head on the […] on my grandmother's thigh. And I asked her, and I began to ask her [...] And she told me about everything and for everything she told me a story, and asked me riddles, and for me that was like a time that [...] no, no [... ] that no longer […]
They can't do it anymore because they passed away, but for me it is, although it was […] unfortunately there was no electricity and stuff, it was a good time for one to be together in community […]
And talk and share, and learn about her history, where she came from […]
I don't know, on my mother's side everything is like […] we are very clingy, we are so clingy, kissing so much, and one on top of the other[…] ehh. Even when an uncle of mine who died two years ago - there was a very large sofa where my aunt and all the cousins were up there, there were more seats, but we were all there in the same place on top of each other. And it's like, we are like that, for me that influences what I want in a partner. And how I would like to be with my children too.